Know Yourself (your emotions) Emotional Intelligence Stage 1 (Spring)

In this blog, I'm going to provide an overview of knowing yourself.  In a spiritual thought about the Good Samaritan, another networking view is to focus on the Levite who looked at the person in the road injured and robbed of his belongings and sizing him up possibly determined he was applying for the same job or going to the same job fair.  So instead of helping this person in need, the Levite left him in the road.  The Samaritan took pity on the injured traveler and with empathy introduced him to a key connection.  We know he was a trusted connnection because he indicated to the inn keeeper, if there were any needs that require additional monies he would make up the difference on another visit.  Making up the diffence is that key ingredient to building and maintaining relationships in our key connections.  The question for us is whether we are more like the Levite - hoarding our connections and leads or like the Samaritan, building relationships and then inviting others into those trusted connections?  I posit that the Samaritan will find joy and job success much faster building and sharing relationships than in hoading them.

In the same networking meeting, our presenter Doug Lange gave an inspiring message about Knowing Yourself and Reaching Your Dreams.  Doing the right things at the right time for the right reasons.  He asked members of the group what made their job search challenging and what inspired them in their search.  Some of those feelings expressed were poignant - family frustrations, interviews that didn't materialize into job offers, and being perfect for positions but not even being called in to interview or even hearing about the position status for months.

Then Doug asked the members to write down their hoped for date to be employed along with their expected date.  Of course those dates differed.  But his challenge to us was to make those 2 dates the same and act as if we envision being hired and act accordingly.  It is true that people can sense despair and frustration in our communications and body language.  Celebrate little victories without spending a lot of money; act as a winner.  He provided a great quotation by Andy Andrews:  "Happiness is not about circumstances.  Happiness is about perspective and perspective is a matter of how we choose to see things, and how we see things is a matter of choice." 

We too often focus our goal in getting a job, but if we focus on outcomes: the ability to have the finances to handle our family responsibilities so we can ....   (e.g. be of greater service, be a more loving parent and spouse, be a better contributor to society, etc.), it gives us greater focus and purpose.  Once we have that outcome embedded in our psyche, we need to act on it as if it is a reality.  To the often asked question, how is your job search going, if we cannot say great than at least indicate some positive things like:  I'm getting some great leads and connections and need some introductions.  Do you happen to know anyone who works in  ________ company or industry?  Or do you know someone who might know someone in that company?  We need to move our expectations into positive behaviors.  Realizing with every closed door we might find other opportunities because of our renewed hope, increased expectation for success and growth along the way.

So what else can we do to know our emotions and act to make them more positive/  For me:
-Yesterday, I received a telephone interview and sent job references from a LinkedIn lead I received.  While it's not a job offer, it is the first step indicating that LinkedIn jobs can provide a modicum of hope.
- Yesterday I found two of my connections and introductions led to other opportunities for others.
- Yesterday, I attended a great networking meeting where the message was acting as if you're hired or close to being hired and celebrate small victories
- Yesterday, a close friend came to visit us and renewing fond acquaitances was a powerful morale boost
- Yesterday a gentleman came to our networking meeting with the possiblity of hiring several from our group in his start up venture and five provided him business cards. I have worked in start up ventures on the project management and staffing operations side.
- Today I'm writing this blog, I'm going to exercise and get back with some of my referencess.  I'm also going to get back with the gentleman who is looking to hire employees.  I'm scheduling our next networking meeting and planting a few more seeds in my garden.  Today I've received the encouragement to expand the garden spot for other produce thanks to suggestions from Bob, my gardening friend from Colorado.  I love Spring and the hope in new growth and more importantly the beginnings of our renewed beliefs and expectations - acting like a winner.